About the Film

Might a genetic mutation be the very thing that allows this nice Jewish butch lesbian to be fully seen at last? Meet Sarah, 57. Lesbian? For sure. Jewish? Yes and no. Mother? In all but one sense. Trans? No, just often mistaken as such. Breast cancer survivor? Well, that’s the plan, the survival bit, but without the cancer or the breasts. Not Quite That is an intimate and insightful exploration of how we are seen, how we see ourselves, and why it matters.

Not Quite That is an On The Creek Films production. Developed with the support of Creative BC and the CMPA-BC (Equity and Emerging Development Program). Produced with the support of TELUS originals, and with the participation of the Government of Canada, Canadian Film or Video Production Tax Credit, and the Province of British Columbia, Film Incentive BC.

Trailer

Screenings

May 4, 2024: London Lesbian Film Festival (London, ON, Canada). Get tickets here.

May 19, 2024: Rainbow Visions Film Festival (Edmonton, AB, Canada). Get tickets here.

May 23-26, 2024: Cinema Systers Film Festival (Paducah, Kentucky, USA). Get tickets here.

Past Screenings:

April 18, 2024: Porto Femme International Film Festival (Porto, Portugal).

April 14, 2024: Vancouver Jewish Film Festival (Vancouver, BC, Canada).

March 16, 2024: Hebden Bridge Film Festival (Hebden Bridge, England).

March 15, 2024: mujerDOC - International Documentary Film Festival on Gender (Soria, Spain).

March 3, 2024: Salt Spring Film Festival (Salt Spring Island, BC, Canada).

February 3 - 18, 2024: World Community Film Festival (Courtenay, BC, Canada).

November 4, 2023: QDoc - Portland Queer Documentary Film Festival (Portland, Oregon, USA).

October 21, 2023: Seattle Queer Film Festival (Seattle, Washington, USA).

October 7, 2023: Bread & Roses Film Festival (Asbury Park, New Jersey, USA).

September 30, 2023: Scottish Queer International Film Festival (Glasgow, Scotland).

May 4 – 14, 2023: DOXA Film Festival (Vancouver, BC, Canada).

Be sure to check back for announcements of other upcoming screenings.

Extras

Want to know more about the BRCA genetic mutation?

Watch this interview with Sarah’s genetic counsellor, Jennifer Nuk, from the BC Cancer Hereditary Cancer Program here using the password BRCA2.

GALLERY

Creative Team

A Film Made By Everyone Who Worked On It

Eternal thanks and most profound respect to Sarah and all her friends and family – you gave so much of yourselves so that this story could be told.

Director’s Notes

“It’s just one more thing where I’m not quite that”.

I was having coffee with my friend Sarah when she said those fateful words. I leaned across the table and asked, “what do you mean, not quite that”? And she said, “oh, you know, I’m Jewish but not very Jewish, I’m a woman but people often think I’m a man, I’m lesbian but I get mistaken for trans, I’m a mom but I didn’t carry the boys, and now here I am seeing a breast cancer surgeon, except I don’t have breast cancer”.

Whoa! There was a whole world of complexity contained in just that one statement – who wouldn’t want to tell that story? But I was a brand-new filmmaker (a mid-50s foray into something completely new), and Sarah wasn’t keen on being the centre of attention. Still, when I said, “let’s make a film about that, it could be my first documentary!”, being the good friend that she is, she agreed to help me “practice”.

And practice we did. That was almost four years ago and what a journey it has been, both for me as a filmmaker, and for Sarah….as Sarah.

Of course, neither of us had a clue about what we were getting ourselves into. I had a very basic notion that I wanted to tell stories that mattered, stories of the extraordinary lives of ordinary women – and this certainly fit that bill. What I was very unaware of, however, was just how much the journey would throw up challenge after challenge - creative, technical, ethical – that ultimately became opportunities to meet that centuries-old maxim to “know thyself”.

I was determined to honour Sarah’s story, however, it unfolded. She had just tested positive for a life-threatening genetic mutation – BRCA2 – which greatly increased her chances of developing breast and/or ovarian cancer. Sarah was going on a difficult journey and the stakes were high; often, I found that my instincts as a friend – to comfort, to discuss, to be fully present – were stronger than my instincts to get her on camera.

But I also knew that surviving wasn’t Sarah’s only concern; how would the preventative surgeries, including a double mastectomy, further complicate her already complicated existence as a long-term, gender non-conforming, butch lesbian? There were lots of layers to a lifetime of being “not quite that”, and I wanted to make visible the rich complexity of long-lived, non-assimilated lesbian lives while trying to capture an unfolding drama which was also very much a story of love, of family, both biological and chosen, of community, of courage, of resistance. As well as receiving unfettered access to this rich web of life over three years, I was blessed with a treasure trove of home movies and photos to work with - from almost four decades of the life that Sarah and her partner Tamara had made together.  

My hope for this film is that viewers will connect with the universals in Sarah’s story, and not only be moved, but inspired by how she grapples with some big questions: how are we seen by others, how do we see ourselves, and why does it matter?, what else do we inherit from our biological families besides genes and what makes us all of who we are?, what forces, external and internal, are at work in the pressure to conform and what does it take to resist those forces over a lifetime?